Is It Worth It?

Is it worth it?

That’s what I ask myself when things get hard. That’s what I ask myself when it seems like life is throwing everything it can my way. That’s what I ask myself when it feels like I can’t take it any more.

Everybody tells you marriage is hard. Everybody tells you having children is hard. Everybody tells you life is hard. But nobody tells you just how hard it all is.

My husband and I have been fighting lately. We recently had our first child and it hasn’t been easy on our marriage. Sleepless nights and parenting differences do not mix well. Thoughtless jokes and jabs at one another turn into tense arguments. Tired comments and remarks make us touchy. Delegation of parenting duties leads to fights and resentment. It’s a lot for a marriage to take on.

So when the times get tough and we’re having yet another disagreement, I pause and I think. Is it worth it?

That sounds harsh. You’re probably thinking I’m questioning my marriage. You probably think I’m contemplating divorce. You probably think that I think my marriage isn’t worth it.

But you would be wrong.

I don’t ask myself if its worth it because I think that it isn’t. I ask myself if it’s worth it because I know that it is.

My relationship with my husband is worth it all. All the fights and disagreements, the 2AM wake up calls and the tears – it’s all worth it. Because the good times are more plentiful than the bad.

Our time together has been filled with love, with laughter, with kindness, and with growth. We’ve tackled cross-country moves, family issues, job changes, and having a child together. We’re strong apart but even stronger together. And the past seven years have only made us stronger. Safer. Better. Closer.

So when I feel my life slipping away, I ask myself that one simple question. That one simple question is all I need. All I need to put my life into perspective and remember what truly matters in this life.

Love. Family. Happiness.

And when I ask myself that one simple question – the answer is always yes. Always.

 

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